"SUN'S UP"

Thoughts from May 29...

I did it. I packed my belongings, left the keys on the ledge, and slipped quietly out the door. I left Vancouver. Again. We've broken up many times. I always go back. Ours is a long, complex, love-hate sort of affair. But this time was different. I learned to see his good qualities and he allowed me some very good times. So this times was different. I felt sad leaving. My sadness was caught in my mouth, but he said nothing. Only offered up moody skies as if to say, "take me or leave me. I ain't changing."

Thoughts from May 30...

Thank you to Dad and Bex. The best of helpers, the sweetest cheesecake and memory makers. Thank you. We shuffled off the evidence of our consumer coil in order to see things in a new way, and they are the ones who bear the burden.

Thank you to our beautiful, generous friends offering up their "pad" for the brief few days until we fly. Without them though it is just a familiar house with a love-starved cat creeping around.


Thoughts from right now direct to you...

...to blog or not to blog...

I suppose this isn't a question for me anymore as I'm in the act right now. For those who've heard me rant on blogs, here is an explanation (and maybe a little for me). I still think blogs are strange. My mind opened to strangers. It's just so not me. But, during our goodbyes, tears have fallen--"six months is a long time"--(we are only going for five months). Many have also said, "I wish I could do that" (you can!) or "I'm a little jealous" (understandably). Vicarious living allowed here!

I am afraid, however, of creating either a painful philosophical posing or a bland daily log as many blogs seem so be. Copious amounts of words are storming through our over-stinulated heads each day. I loathe words that are a waste. More fodder for the burn pile. Not only this, but words in print make me extra wary. Socrates didn't write for a reason. Words take hold of people. They solidify. And we mistaken them for something real, something true forever. Words can be crafted like a lie, or Truth can use them. And the crafters behind words can change. Remember that.

sandra